I had wanted to be a doctor (seemingly the ambition du jour among kids then), but that changed when I  started joining public speaking contests in school.  Encouraged by mentors and inspired by great public speakers, I then aspired to become a lawyer.

I believe my father was overjoyed by the thought of having a lawyer in the family.  I remember him buying me an attache case-like bag for grade school.  Perhaps mindful that it would look rather strange for a kid to be carrying such a bag, he chose one with a cheerful light blue color.  I happily used the bag and my father reveled at seeing me with it.  This was in grade school.  In high school, my father bought me an actual briefcase!  (I still have it, by the way.)  But high school and all the awkwardness it seems to bring out in young people prevented me from fully appreciating that gift of encouragement.  High school, though, reinforced my desire to be a lawyer.  And so when it came to the choice of a college course, it was not hard to make a decision.   It was to be a pre-law course.

My parents were ecstatic that I got in a good university and completely supported my education.  But college held a whole new set of challenges . . . and options . . . for me.  My interest in the arts intensified, and my view of the world changed dramatically – especially when I discovered that I was not at its center (okay, I may have discovered this much later).  Before graduation, the uncertainty was certain.  And I missed, wittingly or unwittingly, the application period in one of the law schools I was eying.  My father was understandably upset; the road map to law school had been drawn, by me no less, and I never hinted at changing course.  But even I was not sure if I wanted to change course; I did not know what to do.

I talked to the guidance counselor who told me to follow my real interest and gave me a reassuring hug.  But pursuing your real interest presupposes you know what it is.  I had to find out what it was quickly since the application for other law schools was soon to close.  Ultimately, I decided I would go to law school because it was the most logical thing to do; if logic appealed to me, then law was the clear choice (although I would later discover that not all laws are based on logic).

And so I went and studied law, but law school was nothing I was prepared for – it’s challenging, consuming and fascinating all at the same time; it could break you if you allowed it, or it could bring out the best in you.  Law school was also humbling.   None of your prior achievements really matter; you come in not as an achiever or honor student but as a law student.  Everyone starts at zero;. you know nothing until proven otherwise.  You would doubt yourself and you would be tempted to quit.  You should be sure to check in your ego before entering the classroom, and be open to the possibility of failure.   But you would learn to live with the anxiety and to cope with the stress, because if you want to be a lawyer, you simply have no choice.  Thankfully, with faith and perseverance, I made it through law school and became the lawyer I had aspired to be.

Carpe diem!

V